Bake
by AlcoholicTree
Summary: The Seiren basketball team is on a mission - to bake the best cake ever for Kagami's birthday. K/K, twoshot.


"Remind me why am I doing this again?" Hyuuga whispered angrily while hiding behind a parked car. They had been hunted, stalked, followed and nearly discovered. It was _dangerous_.

"Because we have to keep this a secret from coach." Shinji (meow-boy) was crouched under a dustbin beside with a handkerchief tied across his head – 'for a greater ninja effect' so he says. From a distance, they could hear Aida yelling out their names furiously. All their training – their stealth, stamina and skills, the Seiren basketball team put themselves up for the challenge. They crept past cautiously, every member tense and terrified. All they have to do is to make it to Kagami's house in one piece.

"Alright, here's the plan guys. We have three hours to sneak in, bake an awesome cake and then when Kuroko brings Kagami in here, we surprise him!" Hyuuga gathered everyone as they huddled around and nodded in agreement. Before Kagami left, Kiyoshi had successfully slipped away with his wallet and found Kagami's house keys. After a few tries, the mass of basketball players stumbled into the apartment.

"We were so close to getting discovered man! If coach finds out and decides to help us bake –" the rest of the team stopped halfway, shuddering in horror. They may be bulky teenage guys relatively clueless about skills in the kitchen, but they could do without help from their loving coach this time.

And so it began.

"Alright team, first years handle the cream, second years we are doing the sponge cake. Seiren, fight-o!"

"Kiyoshi! Pass me the eggs!"

"What the fuck! Don't throw them!"

"Shit! There's egg white on my head now!"

"Take that!" a handful of flour was thrashed into the senior's face.

"Stop it!" Hyuuga successfully prevented a major food fight in Kagami's kitchen, by a swift smack on the head with a spatula. "Not bad, I have the skills. I might even consider being a house husband…"

* * *

"Senpai, what is one cup?" one of the first-years waved the recipe around confusedly.

"Ohohoh like this!" Shinji started grabbing his imaginary boobs while wiggling his eyebrows.

* * *

"Kiyoshi-senpai?" a first-year gaped in horror.

"Yes, what is it?" he looked dazzling mixing the ingredients in the bowl with vigour. Sparkle sparkle. He flashed a reassuring smile at the rest of the juniors, showing them that he was a man of multi-talents, if that rapid stirring was any indication. Kiyoshi frowned slightly, wondering why the two seniors staring at him had gone totally silent. Perhaps they were in awe of his superior arm power?

"IDIOT YOU MADE A HOLE IN THE BOWL! STOP STIRRING!"

* * *

Meanwhile, the first-years were doing not-so-good with the cream. Apparently, they bought blue food colouring instead of vanilla essence and the entire fluffy mixture was dyed dark blue.

"I-it's alright, just don't let Hyuuga-senpai notice – if we add more of the other ingredients the blue dye will fade away and –"

Soon they had about 2 kilograms of baby blue whipped cream.

* * *

"Alright! Now 30 minutes in the oven and it should be done. Hey, not bad! We will have 20 minutes to spare too." The team patted each other on their backs proudly. They had made an achievement today. The jocks proved that they were all worthy to be potential house husbands/wives! Ladies, we're single and available.

It was then that they realised they had to clean up the mess in the kitchen – Kagami's kitchen at that.

* * *

"Flying sponge of fury!"

"Secret soap attack!" Shinji hollered, splattering soapy water all over the table. Their clean-up wasn't that effective, considering that half of the time Tsuchida was sliding on soapy water and falling face flat onto the ground, while Kiyoshi was breaking 50% of the utensils that passed through his 'cleaning station'. Their captain had a sudden personality change after shooting egg shells across the room into the rubbish bin and started insulting everyone, leading to a mini-tussle that took up half their cleaning time.

"Hey, look! The cake is rising pretty weirdly isn't it? It's all lopsided!" one of the members noticed the cancerous tumor in the cake tin.

"It's overheating, isn't it?"

"Quick! We should take it out!"

"No! Don't –"

* * *

"Kagami-kun. Stop it." Kuroko deadpanned, as the overzealous redhead nuzzled his neck and pushed him against his apartment door.

"I don't care, I waited all day for this. It's my birthday isn't it? I'll eat you up as a present." He gave a sloppy nip to emphasize the point.

"Kagami-kun, I don't think it will be good if we enter your apartment like this –"

"Wait, why is my door unlocked?"

The first thing that hit the duo was the sudden darkness. The curtains were purposefully drawn to keep out whatever horrors lay within. Kuroko caught sight of a few terrified first-years making a leap out of the window to save their souls (the apartment is on the second floor thankfully).

"What the fuck is going on here?" Kagami demanded, flipping the light switch on.

Two of their newbies were lying on the ground with their faces smeared in cake mix, while Shinji and Kiyoshi were in a tangled heap under a mass of pots and pans. The captain of the team had his head dunked into the soapy sink, probably after the exploding cake sent him flying backwards. Tsuchida (emo-eyebrows senior) blearily stared at the duo, then calmly smeared cake mix onto his face and lay on the ground once more. On the table was an insane amount of baby blue frosting and a messy sprawl of candles and an even messier card that read 'Happy Berthday'. Yes, Berthday because one of the juniors misspelt it.

Kuroko shifted nervously on the balls of his feet, staring at Kagami (quaking in anger), before pulling him downwards to give him a swift peck on the cheek.

"Happy birthday, Kagami-kun." Kuroko gave it his best attempt to smile.

"I- I"

And then the redhead noticed the two gigantic bowls of blue frosting. He had an idea.

"So, Kuroko. How about taking that 'eating you up' idea literally?" He cocked an eyebrow, smirking deviously.

"Kagami-kun, what do you mean by that?"

"You'll find out soon." Kagami grabbed one of the bowls and a butter knife, dragging Kuroko away from the catastrophe in the kitchen. "Bedroom, now."

* * *

A/N: I hope you get it? Haha. I'm sure the frosting matches Kuroko's hair colour.


End file.
